Loneliness
Loneliness is a universal emotion that most of us experience at least once during our lifetime. However, certain events, such as an illness or a pandemic, can make it feel more pervasive. If you're currently experiencing feelings of loneliness, you aren't alone. In fact, a 2020 study by Cigna found that 61% of Americans reported being lonely in 2019, up from 54% in 2018.
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No matter what events are occurring around you, understanding loneliness and its risks is important for recognising when you may need support. Read on to learn what loneliness is, its causes, long-term risks, and ways to cope with the emotions that may come up when you're lonely.
What is Loneliness?
The American Psychological Association (APA) defines loneliness as the "affective and cognitive discomfort or uneasiness from being or perceiving oneself to be alone or otherwise solitary."
In other words, loneliness is the mental or emotional discomfort you may experience from either being alone or feeling as though you are alone. This feeling stems from your social needs not being met, and/or an inability to get the social connection you desire.
Loneliness vs Being Alone
Although loneliness and being alone are commonly confused, being alone doesn't necessarily mean someone is lonely. "Loneliness is a feeling, while being alone is a situation or state of being, which is not inherently negative," says Nina Vasan, M.D.. Psychiatist and professor at Standford University School of Medicine and chief medical officer at Real, an online mental wellness membership site.
"You can feel lonely even when you're surrounded by other people, such as a partner, family, co-workers, or friends," continues Dr. Vasan.
It's also possible to be alone, but not feel lonely, she adds. "For example, if activities like volunteering, you don't feel lonely."
What Causes Loneliness?
Various demographic factors may contribute to loneliness. Although Dr. Vasan notes that anyone can feel lonely at any time in their life, a few groups that stand out as having an increased risk of loneliness include "young adults, mothers with young children, and the elderly." Immigrants are also at higher risk for loneliness, continues Dr. Vasan.
You may experience loneliness for a variety of reasons, but it can often stem from a major life change. A 2020 study by the University of Edinburgh suggests that the causes of loneliness differ depending on the age of the individual. For example, older adults experience loneliness more frequently as a result of living alone, while middle-aged individuals aren't as likely to report living alone as a cause of their loneliness.
This discrepancy between what causes loneliness in older adults versus those who are middle-aged could be because older adults have retired and no longer have the community and daily interactions of work life, explains Nikki Press, Psy. D., a clinical psychologist in New York City. Older individuals are more likely to have lost friends and family members, and they are more likely to activities and socialising, continues Dr. Press.
Other common causes of loneliness include:
- The death of a close friend or family member
- IIIness or disability
- Retirement
- Working alone
How to Cope with and Prevent Loneliness
Just as the cause of loneliness can vary from person to person, coping and prevention strategies can also differ. In general, the goal is to make strong, healthy connections that fulfill your need for social interaction.
While there is no substitute for help from a mental health professional, the following tips may help you build an emotional connection.
- Find hobbies you enjoy: Taking part in activities you enjoy can be a great way to meet others with similar interests.
- Volunteer for an organisation you support: Volunteering will not only give you a sense of accomplishment and pride, but it's an opportunity to meet others with whom you have something in common.
